Toys That Aren't Supposed to be Scary, but Totally Are!

You can tell Halloween is on the way because I will be posting lots of scary and freaky things. I love Halloween and am fascinated and terrified at the same time of anything morbid, creepy or scary.

So, here is my list of toys that aren't supposed to be scary, but totally are:

Rocking Horse

I don't know about you, but I just don't trust this horse!

Nutcracker

Nothing says "Christmas" like a creepy nutcracker staring you down!

Jack-In-The-Box

Seriously, who came up with this idea for a children's toy?

Ventriloquist Dummy

There is nothing entertaining to me about a ventriloquist or his dummy!

Clowns

I'm not sure if people were scared of clowns before Stephen King's IT came along, but I've always thought they were creepy!

Dolls

Not all dolls are scary I suppose, but the older they are, the scarier they are!

Monkeys

Ok, I suppose this may be Stephen King's fault too with his short story about a scary toy monkey.

Are there any other scary toys that you can think of?

My Favorite Things Swap

I recently participated in A Few of My Favorite Things Swap hosted by Kathie at My Net Finds. Kathie matched us up and we sent our partners a few of our favorite things!

I was lucky to be matched up with Jenny at The Red Bulletin Board. Not only do we live a couple of hours apart, we also have a lot in common! Here is what she sent:


A note from Jenny on a cute Piggy notecard!

Some bath and body works aromatherapy lotion and every Glamour Girl's favorite tool - mascara!

Jenny owns an antique store and she sent this brooch and ring which both look to be antiques!

Halloween and anything related to Halloween is my favorite! So, I was delighted to get a cute halloween decoration and a Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake dessert mix. YUM! I think I'll wait to bake it until I have some friends over next week. I have a feeling I could eat it all myself if I'm not careful!

Thanks Jenny for the awesome gifts! And thanks Kathie for hosting the swap!

By the Way, Your House is Haunted!

Not exactly the conversation you want to have during cocktail hour, right? Well, I had this conversation this past Saturday at my brother's wedding reception. I ran into my parent's next-door neighbors during cocktail hour. I had never really known them that well since they had moved in beside my family shortly before I left for college. But, they had become really close with my parents over the years.

Mrs. Neighbor started telling me that she and her husband had one of those "small world" experiences recently where they went out to eat somewhere out of town and started chatting with their waitress only to discover that she had previously lived in their house. She then started asking me about waitress's family and I explained that she was my brother's age and had two younger brothers.

Then came the question I was dreading, "Did you know the original owners of the house? The S Family?" I said I didn't as they had moved out a couple of years before my family had moved in. Then Mrs. N lowered her voice and said, "Not a lot of people know this, but the S Family's son committed suicide in the house."

I nodded. I had known this. My heart started pounding and my mouth went dry. She was going to start prying and I am such a bad liar! I mean, how do you tell someone that their house is haunted????

The suicide had happened just a few years before we moved onto the street and it was still the talk of the neighborhood. The S family had already moved out and a new family had moved in. The woman that lived there told my mom that she had never believed in ghosts until she lived in that house. She would hear somebody in the kitchen, silverware rattling, dishes clanking, drawers opening and closing. She was terrified. Needless to say, the family did not last long there.

The W Family then moved in (waitress's family). I was about 13 at the time and my parents made my brother and I promise that we would not tell the W kids about the history of the house. It didn't matter, the three W kids were terrified of the house. The oldest, M, was often left alone and would show up on our doorstep, crying and insisting that someone was in the house. The worst was when she said there was "something" under her bed. We never offered to check it out, we always just told her to stay at our house until her parents got back.

I only stepped foot in that house twice in my life and twice was certainly enough! You could feel the bad vibes. Over the past 15 years I kept thinking that it was strange that the N Family had never mentioned anything bad about the house to my parents. Now I was about to find out why...

Mrs. N continued her conversation with me. She didn't find out about the suicide until after they had bought the house. Her husband brushed off the news with a laugh, but she was concerned enough to make a visit to her church pastor to explain the situation. He gave her a special prayer to say in the house to bless it and do away with any bad spirits. Then she laughed, saying that she had no idea if anything was ever bad about the house to begin with, but saying the prayer had made her feel better.

I didn't want to freak her out, but I had to say something. Maybe it was the wine talking, but I let her know that she did a good thing. Somehow she had changed whatever was going on in the house. Mrs. N looked shocked, but also a little bit proud of herself. I didn't go into detail, but I let her know that something had been in the house and the two families before hers had felt its presence.

A smile crept across her face, "See! I knew it! Mr. N doesn't believe in that kind of thing. I can't wait to tell him that I got rid of the ghost!"

I could tell she wanted to learn more, but we were interrupted to take our seats for the bride and groom to arrive. I can't believe after all these years the N Family finally knows the truth about the haunting and the story ended up happily ever after anyway!

Glamour Brother Gets Married

Sorry I've been MIA, but I had a Glamour Family wedding this past weekend. As if my brother and I hadn't done enough over the years to give my parents a heart attack, we also both got married this year!

I have to say that although we're good friends now, Glamour Brother and I didn't get off to a very good start. I wanted a little sister and he turned out to be a boy. So, what was a girl to do but inflict years of torture on GB, dressing him up in my clothes, curling his hair, forcing him to play with Barbies, etc.

Needless to say, we had our differences. He got way into the grunge phase, I was preppy; he was messy, I was a clean freak; I loved school, he hated it; he had to endure endless voice and dance recitals, plays, musicals, fashion shows, etc. and I had to...well...I had to put up with...um....whatever it was he did.

Let's just say that we never really got along when we lived in the same house. Lots of screaming, fighting, punching, pinching, hair pulling, scratching, cracking skulls and of course, all the stuff he did to me. But then something very strange happened when I moved away to college. It was my first week there and I was living in the dorm when my phone rang and my roommate ran to answer it (you know, back in the day before cell phones).

Roomie: "GG, it's for you. It's a BOY!"
Me (jumping up and down and then answering nonchalantly as possible): "Hello?"
GB: "Hey!"
Me (to Roomie): "It's not a boy - it's just GB!"
Me (trying not to sound too disappointed): "Hey, what's up?"
GB: "I was wondering when I could come and visit?"

And that was it, we have been good friends ever since. Perhaps that has to do with the fact that we have lived in different states for the past ten plus years. Regardless, I have discovered that we have much more in common than I ever thought. You know, even more than our good looks and our love of Guns N Roses! And - shocker - he wants to move from Chicago to where I am to be closer to his big sis. AWWWWW!!! I'm sure it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that the weather is much better ;)

Congratulations on your marriage GB!

Angels Among Us

I thought this was such a beautiful picture that I had to share it with you. I took this picture about 10 years ago on the back roads of West Virginia. I have no idea why this angel was sitting by the side of the road or why it has no head. I had actually forgotten about the photo when I stumbled upon it while unpacking at the new house. I took it out of my photo album, framed it and put it in my bedroom.

Trailer Trash and Blogger Awards

I hope everyone had a fabulous Labor Day weekend! My plan was to write a bunch of posts over the long weekend, but you can see how that went. But...my Trailer Trash Bash housewarming party was awesome! Due to popular request, I have posted a pic of our rockin' airbrushed tshirts. Notice HH is squirting Cheese Whiz into his mouth! Keeping it classy!!!

Ok, now onto something I've been meaning to do for a REALLY long time. I am giving you a list of some really KICK ASS bloggers! Why are they so kick ass, you ask? Well, because they have all recognized that I am also kick ass and have given me an award! Thank you so much!

It really means a lot to me that I have made so many blogger friends and that so many people are actually interested in what I have to say. I'm still in complete amazement!

A H.I.T. at a NYC Housewife-In-Training gave me the One Lovely Blog Award.

The Kick Ass Blogger Award is from Zoe at Zoe Rights.

The Honest Scrap Award is from Ebony Haywood at Sizzling Publications.


Kathie at My Net Finds gave me the following two awards, Splash Award and the You're a Gem Award.

The You're a Gem Award is especially important to me because Kathie made it herself to pass along to other bloggers. In her own words, "I made this award for the special bloggers who take the time to not only read my posts, but also leave comments, respond to comments, form blog friendships with and support others, answer blogger questions, etc.....the ones who are a real "gem" in the bloggy world."

So, I am passing this along to some new blogger friends I have found recently. Come on down and accept your award:

Amanda at Martinis or Diaper Genies?

Llama at Llama Tales

JennyMac at Let's Have a Cocktail

Tracy at Iced Karma Coffee

Life's Short. Type Fast.

Preppy Coastee

The Life of a Suburban Princess

Jenny S at The Red Bulletin Board

Martinis or Diaper Genies?

It's Friday!!! And I've invited one of my very favorite bloggers here to meet you and tell you a little more about herself. Let me just tell you that she and I are two peas in a pod. And even though she's a brand new blogger, she has the ability to crack me up everyday. Seriously! Sometimes I'm laughing so hard that my co-workers will pop their heads in my office to see what is so funny.

When you're done finding out more about my featured blogger, stop on over to her blog to see my post! Enjoy!



Well hello glamorous world. I am Amanda and it’s glamorous to meet you.

I write a little blog called Martinis or Diaper-Genies. You may have read about it on CNN or the NY Times or just not at all because that’s only happened in my mind. Over at MODG we talk about the ultimate decision most of us make at some point, between babies and the selfish life. My values currently reside heavily with my DVR, red wine, and fighting an ultimate war with the fat gods who literally force pizza down my throat.

Yes I’m afraid too.

Now you may be saying to yourself, “Amanda, you are clearly not ready for a baby” to which I would respond “no shit, I am a hot mess.” But I cannot, for the life of me, no matter what, explain the desire I have to track my basal temperature (used for tracking eggs and baby things), look a little too long at friend’s baby pictures, or internet stalk Suri Cruise (ok that may be another issue all together).
I mean, come on. How can you not want to know what she bought for fall?

Some of my concerns:
1) What will our child look like? Can I honestly deal with a troll baby if that is the path that is chosen for me?
2) Will I ever be skinny again? Don’t judge, I never claimed to be Michelle Duggar.
3) Can I go 9 months without alcohol? Still with the judging….
4) Will I be able to afford the shoes and bags I love so much ever again?

B is my husband. B likes sports, beer and farting. I let B get away with the farting because he’s pretty hot and overall good guy. B says no baby for now as a result of the quality of my concerns listed above. B is pretty sensible about most things and has a part time job rolling his eyes at me.
OK, it’s actually the head of Cole Hamels, not my husband. Whatever.

So I would love if you would stop by the ol’ blog. Hang out, have some guac with us and weigh in on my life. Stick around for a chat about Britney, how J.Crew rapes me of my money or Tuesdays with “The Single Guy”. I’ll be looking for you. Tell them that Glamour Girl sent you and you’ll get a free taco.

The Airbrushed Airhead

Labor Day weekend is coming up and Hottie Husband and I are having a housewarming party Saturday night to celebrate. The theme? Trailer Trash Bash!

I figured this was brilliant! Since we have been in the house less than two months, we really haven't had the time to fix everything up like we want. So, the backyard is still a mess and the decor is not yet all in place. This way we won't be embarassed when our friends wonder why we haven't gotten all this stuff done yet - it's part of the theme! DUH! It's also a great excuse to use up all those random paper plates we have stored through the years - Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving. Anything goes! I also don't have to wait to whip out my Halloween themed serving trays and chip and dip bowl!

But, as for our costumes, I wanted to do something different. I mean sure, there's no problem wearing a wife beater or some NASCAR attire, but that was too obvious. Then it hit us last night when we were eating dinner - we needed matching airbrushed tshirts!!!

(Note: picture above is not our shirt, but pretty darn close!)

After dinner we ran to the mall and found exactly what we were looking for at one of those kiosks. Next problem - explaining to the guy what we wanted without laughing and poking fun at his regular customers. Now, it's clear that little Mr. and Mrs. J Crew that we are do NOT look like one of his regular customers and I thought it would be way too obvious. So, I opted to go with the truth instead. I started out by telling him that we were having a Trailer Trash party (uh oh!) and we wanted cheesy airbrushed tshirts with hearts and our names on it. He looked at me like I was crazy and shook his head. I saw HH giving me a look out of the corner of my eye, but I went on anyway...

"You know, like some cheesy tshirt they sell at the beach. I mean, not anything like you're wearing...I mean, the airbrush tshirt that you are wearing is really cool...we are just looking for something that we wouldn't normally wear...but I would totally wear the awesome tshirt that you're rocking right now...uhhhh"

I was digging a hole and the dude still looked confused when diplomatic-as-can-be HH stepped in and pointed to a heart with wings in the example book at the kiosk. "We want this. With both of our names on it."

"Ok!" the dude nodded and started writing down the order.

HH (as we walked away): "Uh, good job GG! Making fun of the dude we're trying to order tshirts from."

GG (at a loss for words): "Well, COME ON! Really? I mean...what was I supposed to do? Uhhhh!"

I think I'm going to surprise HH with another airbrush tshirt for his birthday. I'm thinking a mountain scene with a wolf and a bald eagle!

Enough is Enough (Controversy Alert!)

Let's talk about the Duggar family for a minute, shall we? In case you haven't heard of them, they are the annoying people whose main purpose in life is to procreate and then exploit said procreation on a television reality show. Sound familiar (hello Gosselins? Octomom?). But, the difference between the Duggars and the other child-bearing opportunists is that the Duggars do it under the guise of Christianity. As long as they can promote Christianity and their supposed debt-free lifestyle (with credit given to some financial scam seminar they promote) to their viewing audience, then what's the problem?

Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar went on the Today show this morning to announce that they are pregnant with their 19th child. Yeah! They believe that each child is a blessing from God and will let Him decide how many children they will ultimately have. Ok, so I agree that each child is a blessing from God, but do they ALL have to be raised by the Duggars? God also blessed them with a brain, why don't they use it more productively?

And furthermore, hasn't this poor woman's uterus been through enough? She claims that she didn't know about this latest pregnancy at first. She was exercising and following Weight Watchers to lose weight from the 18th child and wondered why she couldn't seem to lose any weight. Wait a minute - how in the HELL does this woman have time to diet and exercise??? I don't have time to diet and exercise!!!!! Oh yeah, because each of her older children are assigned a baby to take care of. This frees up Michelle to spend her time brainwashing, I mean teaching, her daughters that their future should consist of nothing but cooking, cleaning and procreating.

Don't get me wrong, as long as these people aren't infringing on my rights and using my taxpaying dollars for their own benefit, then they can do whatever they want. But, how much bad press and negativity did Octomom have to endure while the Duggars always get the royal treatment? Just because the Duggars are married and promote Christianity does not mean what they are doing is ok. These children did not choose to be reality tv stars, nor did they choose to spend their childhood raising their younger siblings. Where should the line be drawn?

Perhaps I'm just a bitter, cynical, cobwebbed womb woman, who knows? What do you think?

P.S. The above gawd-awful picture was taken several years before their reality tv show came about. They have since modernized their look. Perhaps so the American television viewers can better relate?

I Feel Pretty

I'm like a giddy schoolgirl today. Why? Because I am featuring an interview with one of my favorite bloggers - Legally Blonde Mel of I Pick Pretty. When I first encountered her online, I felt like the nerdy girl in the back of the class that wanted so much for the popular girl to like her. If LBM picks pretty, was I pretty enough to be her friend? I was thrilled when she began following my blog as well. She likes me! She really likes me!!!

Without further ado, I bring you the fabulous, witty, fashionable and pretty (of course) Legally Blonde Mel...

Based on your profile pic and your nom de plume, I am picturing you as a cross between Grace Kelly and Elle Woods. Am I way far off base? Are we ever going to get a glimpse of the real Mel?

If I’m having a very, very good day, complete with that mystical fuzzy Oprah lighting, I get compared to Ellen Pompeo or Renee Zellweger - read: squinty and blonde-ish. Grace and Elle more reflect my writing state of mind, the endless quest for that (wholly imaginary) perfect blend of professional excellence and personal style. Honestly, I never set out to be mysterious about my real identity; I initially didn’t post personal pictures out of fear of being Dooced. Now it’s more the issue of how to compete with all of the Grace Kelly photos, and the fact that she so embodies that exaggerated Ice Queen voice my blogging comes out in.

I’ll out myself one day soon, but this being me, there will be some sort of twist to it. Sometimes a girl just needs a twist, no? For what it’s worth, should any of you (non crazies) find yourself Austin, I’d love to meet for a drink and prove that I’m not actually a 43-year-old Guamanian father of six. I won’t even refer to you as my “pet” or my “darling”, believe it or not!

I’ve been fortunate enough to meet some of my favorite bloggers (The Freckled Citizen; TUWABVB; The Coconut Diaries; Milltini; SLynnRo; Elefantitas Alegres; Make Mine a Mojito) in person & hope someday to share a cocktail or ten with you and other readers. (GG Note: Oh! I'm there - I'm not crazy, I promise! Well, most of the time anyway...)

You often talk about the Ice Princess persona. I've been referred to that way many times based on how I look, which has sometimes made making friends pretty difficult. Have you ever had that problem? You do a good job at maintaining a "Prettier than Everyone Else" Ice Princess persona, but still being 100% likeable - any helpful tips on how to achieve this?

Thank you! As Betty Draper once said, “My people are Nordic”; so yes, I’ve absolutely had that problem. Combine my family background & whatever it is about my appearance, along with a natural tendency to be somewhat shy, and I’ve found myself battling that perception over the years. As I’ve written about before, I’m a recovering introvert – one that’s married to a raging extrovert, that is. With enough time, effort, and liquor, I like to think I’m making progress. I just try to remember that we all just want to be liked, and try to act kindly (mostly) from there.

Who are your top five favorite blondes of all time?

I take the Elle Woods approach to this – blonde is more a state of mind. This has absolutely nothing to do with the color of my roots. Ahem. My favorite blondes (the ones I’m not related to, that is):
1) Grace Kelly (GG Note: Shock!)
2) Jane Austen – Surprised? Perhaps she wasn’t strictly a blonde in real life, but I can’t think of anyone who better captures that spirit. The only author whose works I re-read annually.
3) Janet Leigh – another definitive Hitchcock (I’m a huge fan) blonde
4) Kate Winslet
5) Anna Wintour (I’d call her more blondish, but I’m afraid of her) (GG Note: I think everyone is!)

You're a lawyer in real life, but what is your ultimate dream job?

As much as I adore the practice of law (Miss America answer intro) . . . I’d like to have children even more than I’d like a vintage Kelly bag, just to give you the idea of how much I look forward to starting a family. But seriously, if the stars align, I will have a few Ralph Lauren ad style children, be running the PTA in manner of the fiercest South American dictator, and have time to blog more & do some freelance writing.

My inner word nerd would love to teach literature and American government, so that may be in my future as well. Oh, and I’d like a pony. Or ten. So something that supports that.

Your pug Wallace is adorable! My cat, Simon Jefferson, often likes to guest blog for me. Any chance that we'll see Wallace pen a few posts?

Thank you! Wallace, shameless show-off that he is, isn’t much of a writer. Too busy chasing the chicks. Actually, I’ve shied away from any pet writing due to my family, who likes to send out Christmas letters – not mere cards, but letters – as authored by Spike the cat. Nothing like finding out the details of your stepfather’s prostate surgery from your family feline. So I enjoy reading your & other blogger’s posts in this style, but I can’t quite go there yet. (GG Note: Perhaps we will hear from Spike then?)

I read your very first post where you persuaded readers that they should like you better than (insert Skank name here that rhymes with Maris). Not a tough choice for me, I've already cast my vote for you! How has your blog evolved since then?

I’d like to think I’ve grown as a writer over the past year, figuring out what feels authentic and creating a unique voice. As my writing has evolved, I’ve changed the design (meaning: hired excellent designers to do it for me), such that it now looks and sounds like something I’m proud of most days and representative of (a very over-the-top version of) me.

You recently celebrated your one year blogging anniversary - Congratulations! And you have over 400 followers. I'm impressed. Care to share any secrets of your blogging success?

Thanks! I haven’t the slightest idea. I mean, I’m egotistical and all, but I’m truly flattered that even one of you reads my dreck. But seriously, I try to stay focused on the writing (believe it or not) and not on my stat counter or how many followers I have. I figure if the content is decent & something I find enjoyable, hopefully others will like it too.

For any new bloggers out there (although at year 1, I count myself as a newbie too), regularly reading & commenting on blogs you enjoy is a very good start. Good, genuine comments – ie, not ones that are left solely to Pimp Your Blog – are one means to getting readers, and more importantly, they give you a different way to interact with the bloggers you like. For more on this subject, my blog friend NYC HIT recently wrote a terrific post about this here.

You've won an Academy Award! Who is designing your dress?

I may be a recovering introvert, but what I wouldn’t give for a day of red carpet primping and glamour. Hell, I’d happily strumpet back and forth in front of my house if couture were involved – no need for an event. I love the classics – Oscar de la Renta, Carolina Hererra, YSL, Chanel – but I also like what Thakoon and Marchesa are putting out as well. Kate Winslet at the 2009 Oscars was the picture of red carpet perfection to me. “Mad Men” aholic that I am, I’d hire that show’s wardrobe mistress to pull it all together with an early 60s sensibility. That’s right, Rachel Zoe, you heard me.

Mel - thanks for stopping by and being my very first interview! Check out I Pick Pretty right now for more style, wit, sarcasm and fun! And not by any means because she is featuring me on her blog today as well ;)

Pickle Day

It's Wednesday and you know what that means - It's Pickle Day!!!!

Ok, now I know that you're thinking I've really lost my mind...but not completely. You see, from the moment I could speak, I announced that Wednesdays and Saturdays were pickle days. I don't think I was really making any kind of political statement. As you may remember from a couple of posts ago, I'm a picky eater. I think I was really just trying to justify my love of McDonald's hamburgers despite the fact that they always automatically included a pickle, which I did not particularly care for. I figured I had to give that pickle a shot, but only if we happened to be at McDonald's on a Wednesday or Saturday.

Well, flash forward thirty years and of course my parents and any others in my life that know about "pickle days" have never let me live it down. I have actually developed a taste for pickles since then, but I have to be in a certain mood.

For example, last Wednesday Hottie Husband and I were eating lunch at a deli and my sandwich included a pickle on the side. He tried to insist that I had to eat the pickle since it was indeed Pickle Day. I tried to explain to him that eating a pickle on Pickle Day wasn't mandatory, but optional. It was just an opportunity to eat said pickle if I felt like it.

Then I went grocery shopping on Sunday and picked up a jar of pickles. On Monday I decided that I felt like eating a pickle. HH caught me in the act. "It's not Pickle Day!!!" he insisted. Well, yeah, but I felt like having a pickle.

HH just doesn't get it. I made the rules, I can break them, right?

Oh yeah, I also can't eat a grape unless a bell rings. Another long story...